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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28370073">the beauty of a secret</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MargotCelvin/pseuds/MargotCelvin'>MargotCelvin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>completely unrelated "songfics" [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hamlet - Shakespeare</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Inspired by Shakespeare, Like I was, M/M, Not Beta Read, Secret Relationship, Song: Strange Love (Halsey), Songfic, Terrible Parental Relationships</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:27:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,353</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28370073</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MargotCelvin/pseuds/MargotCelvin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hamlet was good at keeping secrets when he wanted to. And he was good at only giving partial information to watch those around him go mad. This time, it was about a lover. One that no one but him knew the name of. </p><p>Based (very loosely) on Halsey’s Strange Love.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hamlet/Horatio (Hamlet)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>completely unrelated "songfics" [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1989844</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>the beauty of a secret</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I realize the song is supposed to be about a past relationship but like I really like the idea of Hamlet flaunting his relationship but never revealing his lover’s name, mostly to be a little shit.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <ol>
<li>Laertes</li>
</ol><p>The halls were quiet as Hamlet made his way to his suite. Classes had been horrendous lately as every professor crammed in too much information before finals. If one more philosophical question about human existence was thrown his way his brains would decorate the walls.</p><p>He wanted nothing more than to lose his mind in something trivial. Really, he wanted to have his brain fucked out of him but he would have to wait a few more hours for that, so something generally relaxing would have to do for the time being. If he timed this right, he could probably have food ready for tonight which would be impressive since his kitchen had started mostly as a decoration that came with the suite.</p><p>“Hamlet!” The crown prince of Denmark slowed down slightly at the shouting of his name. He didn’t really want to speak with Laertes but he also needed to keep up appearances. You never knew who was watching. “Hey, I’m glad I ran into you.”</p><p>“You chased me down a hallway, I don’t think that counts as running into each other,” his voice was flatter than normal.</p><p>“Oh come now, you only have that tone because your appetites aren’t being satisfied,” Hamlet stopped in his tracks, causing Laertes to end up a few steps ahead of him, “What?”</p><p>“What makes you think my ‘appetites’ aren’t being satisfied?” far too much sarcastic emphasis was put on the word appetites but the point needed to be made that Laertes sounded like an idiot.</p><p>“You’re not seeing anyone and you haven’t for quite some time so I’m sure you are starving,” a few steps from the taller of the two closed the space between them, “I could help you with that though.”</p><p>“No thanks,” Hamlet tried to step around but was stopped by a hand on his chest.</p><p>“Why not? You used to beg for me to-”</p><p>“I never begged, especially not for you,” Hamlet interrupted. He couldn’t say that he has never begged for something, because that would be a lie, but it certainly was true that he had never begged for anything from the tall idiot in front of him. “And I will have you know; I am seeing someone and they are far better in bed that you will ever be.”</p><p>“Who?” God he hated when Laertes sounded this smug.</p><p>“None of your business,” Hamlet shouldered his way past the young lord and tried to hurry his way back to the safety of his suite. Unfortunately, Laertes was not done with this conversation.</p><p>“I have a right to know who it is that is better than me to the great prince Hamlet.”</p><p>Hamlet turned suddenly to face him, anger rolling off him in waves, “Listen here you mock tabloid, I don’t have to fucking tell you anything. My secrets are my own and they will remain that way until I decide to grant that information to anyone. And your ‘right’ to that knowledge does not exist, nor will it ever. Do I make myself clear?”</p><p>“You really have gone insane.” Hamlet rolled his eyes and walked off at the newest reminder of the rumors that were spread around court. He was quite sick of everyone thinking he had lost his mind when he was quite sane, given the circumstance.</p><p>If he thought he needed to get railed into oblivion beforehand, he desperately needed it now.</p><p> </p>
<ol>
<li>Claudius and Polonius</li>
</ol><p>Hamlet was completely ready to admit that he probably should’ve been paying more attention to the meeting he was sitting in on. He was the future king of Denmark after all. But this was boring and he missed his lover more than he would like to admit. He knew that coming back to Denmark for winter break was a terrible idea, but he also knew how suspicious it would look for him to stay at Wittenberg. Plus, he did actually like interacting with citizens when he volunteered his time.</p><p>That doesn’t mean that he missed the privacy of his suite and the company of his lover any less while he was here. The only downside of his lover being a secret was that he couldn’t drag them to Denmark with him.</p><p>Hamlet straightened in his seat when Claudius cleared his throat next to him. He had been caught daydreaming in meetings long enough that the others around them paid no attention. At least he was in the clear from a lecture for the next hour or so while some old man was going on about something that Hamlet didn’t really care about.</p><p>That happened to be the longest hour of his entire life, especially when his mind wandered off the strong hands that would grip his hips and leave fingerprints on his skin. Luckily, he was able to keep all of his thoughts completely covered in the natural mask he had made himself over the years.</p><p>However, the lecture he was expecting about needed to grow up and pay attention since he would be king one day was completely sidestepped. Claudius seemed as though he knew his words would be wasted on the subject and was just going to let Hamlet leave with no words exchanged whatsoever.</p><p>“My son tells me you have some secret lover,” Polonius just had to open his big mouth didn’t he. Hamlet had almost been out the door but he turned to see the shock on his uncle’s face and the same smug look Polonius shared with his son.</p><p>“Why is this the first I am hearing of this woman?” Claudius asked.</p><p>“Their identity is a secret, hence <em>secret lover</em> as Polonius said.”</p><p>“Hamlet,” he rolled his eyes when his name was said like he was some petulant child by a man who acted like his father but was just having sex with his mother, “as your king, I have a right to know who it is you’re keeping relations of any kind with. So, you will tell me who this person is.”</p><p>“I’m not going to tell you, <em>king</em> or not.”</p><p>“Why must you make everything so difficult?” Polonius asked. He really did think he had to make a comment of everything, especially stuff that wasn’t his business. No wonder Claudius liked him.</p><p>“I’m not being difficult. I’m not telling anyone who they are.”</p><p>“Despite it taking up so much of your thoughts?”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Why not?” Claudius sounded so annoyed, which really only fueled Hamlet to take this further.</p><p>“I don’t want to tell anyone. Why should I have to give my partner’s identity away? Even if I want to talk about them. Although, I have no interest in talking about my love life with either of you.”</p><p>“I’m sure he just means sex life,” Polonius commented, pretending that Hamlet couldn’t hear him.</p><p>“You don’t fucking know anything about me or who I’m with. So quit acting like you do.” Hamlet stormed out, done with this conversation. He wasn’t going to be able to avoid the two for his entire holiday but at least he could avoid this topic again by only seeing them during official meetings.</p><p>God, he needed to rant at someone, and he knew exactly who to call.</p><p> </p>
<ol>
<li>Gertrude</li>
</ol><p>“I hear you have a lover,” Hamlet had resigned himself to the fact that this was going to be how most of his conversations were going to start while he was back in the castle. It was his mother this time. She pulled his attention away from his text conversation with Horatio who had stayed at Wittenberg. Hamlet had been admitting that Horatio was right again, and that he did hate coming home.</p><p>“I do.”</p><p>She joined him on the chaise he had spread out on. “Is it serious?”</p><p>“I don’t know. Probably.” It was, he just didn’t particularly want to tell her that.</p><p>“Hamlet, you need to remember that a prince cannot have flings with any girl he meets at university. Your relationships have to mean something. Any woman you date could be a future queen.” He tried not to roll his eyes, for many reasons.</p><p>“I guess. But, no one knows who this is so I don’t really have to worry about it right now, now do I, Mother.”</p><p>“Why is it a secret?”</p><p>“Because I want it to be.” He really had a hard time figuring out why people seemed to be having such a hard time with this concept.</p><p>“Don’t your people have a right to know who a future monarch of theirs could be?”</p><p>“I don’t think so, no. I don’t think anyone has a ‘right’ to any information that is not their own.”</p><p>“Do you not want to say their name?”</p><p>“I do say their name. To them. When we have sex.” He said their name more than just then, but he loved torturing his mother, he called it revenge. But he felt justified since she married his uncle a month after his father suspiciously died.</p><p>“Is that all you’re with this person for?”</p><p>“No. But the reason I’m with them is also not yours to know.”</p><p>“Is this relationship important to you or not?” Hamlet didn’t answer and only watched his mother for a moment, trying to see if he could guess where this conversation was going to go before she continued with, “I don’t understand how you can be so okay with no one knowing.”</p><p>“What, because I love attention?”</p><p>“You’ve always loved attention but you also love flaunting what you deemed yours so that everyone knew no one else could have that thing.” She was right, he did do that. Hell, he did it with this relationship, just no one noticed this time.</p><p>He had gotten good at making his lover reduced to a speechless puddle, even in public places. But he was prouder of the fact that he had made himself so unforgettable to this lover that they would never be able to be with someone else without thinking of the prince.</p><p>It had nothing to do with the fact that he was a prince. It was much more about how he said their name and how he dug his nails in their shoulders when they gripped his hips just the right way. It was about how they would write in the fog of all the windows that sat nearby. Hamlet knew he would never be the same, and he was sure his lover felt the same.</p><p>“I feel like you have no interest in keeping hold of this if you’re not willing to share it with anyone. I can’t believe that you’re serious about this relationship if you don’t tell anyone, based entirely on your previous actions.”</p><p>“My previous actions have not always been the best. I will dig up Yorick and monologue to his skull again.” In his defense, Hamlet had just started taking medication at the time so all of his intentions were a little blurry. He had however scared off the graverobbers with that little stunt so net gain overall.</p><p>The threat certainly had the effect he was going for this time. His mother sighed, mumbled something about Hamlet being a child, and leaving his room.</p><p>If he hadn’t been thinking about his lover before, he certainly was now. He just needed someone that cared about him with nothing else attached to it.</p><p> </p>
<ol>
<li>Rosencrantz and Guildenstern</li>
</ol><p>It had been bugging them for months. Claudius had asked them to figure out who Hamlet’s secret lover was and so far they had gotten nowhere. They only ever saw Hamlet hanging out with their small group of friends and he never texted whoever this great lover was in front of them. Guildenstern had even managed to swipe his phone and saw that he only ever texted the two of them, Ophelia, and Horatio. So, unless Hamlet was erasing the conversations right after they happened, they still had no leads. They couldn’t even figure out what gender they were. Rosencrantz says girl and Guildenstern says guy.</p><p>The two of them caught sight of Hamlet, Horatio, and Ophelia in the library. This was one of the only places that Hamlet would actually work which was why Horatio made them meet there all the time.</p><p>The two plopped down at their table and pulled the others’ attention to them. Horatio sighed through his nose when he noticed that Rosencrantz and Guildenstern didn’t have any class materials with them. Hamlet tried not to sigh as well. Ophelia continued to ignore their presence; she had gotten good at it.</p><p>“How can I help you?” Hamlet asked. He had a feeling that he knew where this was going to go and was proven right, much to his dismay.</p><p>“You can tell us who this lover of yours is,” Guildenstern said.</p><p>“Direct to the point today I see,” Hamlet said, “But no. I won’t tell you who it is.”</p><p>“Why not?” Guildenstern asked.</p><p>“I do not need to justify my actions to either of you. Now if you don’t mind, I was in the middle of something.” Hamlet had actually been in a good groove when it came to writing a paper for his philosophy class and if he didn’t get back to it soon he would lose his train of thought and the essay would be a bust for the day.</p><p>“Oh come on, give us anything,” Guildenstern pleaded.</p><p>“I don’t need to,” Hamlet didn’t bother looking back up from his laptop at the other two.</p><p>“But you want to,” Rosencrantz prodded. Hamlet looked up and met their eyes. He leaned forward and spoke.</p><p>“You may know this one thing, they walk like a god and you can never imagine how weak I make them,” Hamlet had matched their mischievous tone, which they were clearly not expecting.</p><p>“Well, this has been a riveting conversation. Certainly, what I wanted to do at the library where most people study,” Horatio had already finished gathering his things and stood to leave, “I’ll see you later, my lord. Ophelia.”</p><p>“Goodbye Horatio,” Hamlet said, flirty tone thick in his voice. Horatio chuckled uncomfortably and left the building.</p><p>“Why do you torture him like that?” Ophelia asked.</p><p>“Fun.”</p><p>“Why can’t you trust us with the name of your lover?” Rosencrantz whined. It was incredibly irritating and certainly distracted Hamlet from watching Horatio walk away.</p><p>“What? So you can tell my uncle? Absolutely not.”</p><p>“I’m not a snitch,” Guildenstern lied.</p><p>“I don’t really believe that but okay.”</p><p>“Why can’t you tell us?” Rosencrantz asked, Guildenstern was still too in shock at being told he was a liar so bluntly to talk.</p><p>“It’s not that I can’t. I’m just not going to. This thing that I have is mine and it will be staying like that until I decide otherwise,” Hamlet was quiet for a moment before adding, “I’m not willing to share this completely with anyone.”</p><p>The three men ignored the look Ophelia gave Hamlet. Hamlet because he just didn’t want to see the pity he knew would be in her eyes, the other two were too laser focused on Hamlet, berating him with questions, many of which were mildly insulting.</p><p>Hamlet ignored all of the questions and began packing up his materials, understanding that he would be getting nothing else done today. He was far too annoyed with the questioning to get back into the rhythm he had set up for himself. He nodded to Ophelia and the two of them stood, making their way out of the library.</p><p>He was glad that she knew the complicated route he took to get to her suite as to not be seen or followed. His mind was far off.</p><p> </p>
<ol>
<li>Ophelia</li>
</ol><p>The two of them were in Ophelia’s suite since Rosencrantz and Guildenstern didn’t know where exactly she lived. The two of them were leaned together on the couch and passed a bottle of wine back and forth, although it had mostly become Hamlet drinking the wine straight out of the bottle. She had been just as annoyed about the ambush as Hamlet had.</p><p>“Why does Horatio still call you ‘my lord’? Aren’t the two of you friends?” the question had been on her tongue since Horatio left the confrontation in the library. The two of them had barely escaped without Rosencrantz and Guildenstern following them and continuingly throwing accusations and questions at Hamlet.</p><p>“We are. I have told him a thousand times that he doesn’t need to call me that and that just Hamlet would be fine, but he can’t stop.”</p><p>“Can’t or won’t?”</p><p>After a moment of thought and a long drink he said, “I’m going with can’t.”</p><p>“And what about your lover? Is that a can’t or a won’t?” He moved his head so that he could actually look at her.</p><p>“Won’t. There is nothing stopping me from telling you.” She was quiet and raised her eyebrows, waiting for a name. He shook his head at her, which made her roll her eyes and groan.</p><p>“I can’t believe you won’t tell me. I have been your best friend since birth, I have a right to know.”</p><p>“You really don’t,” he downed a lot more of the wine. She let him, hoping that a tipsy Hamlet would let this tiny secret slip. It wouldn’t, but she could hope.</p><p>“But I want to know,” she sounded so pathetic, it was kind of funny.</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“I want to thank whoever this is for reminding you what being happy is like.”</p><p>Hamlet let that information sink in for a moment before he said, “I’ll tell them you give your thanks.”</p><p>“I’ll let that slide, for now. But I get to be the first to know when you finally spill. Deal?”</p><p>“I guess I can agree to that.”</p><p>“Can I at least have some fun details that no one else gets? I know you love giving vague hints because it feeds your ego.” Hamlet did not want to admit that but it was completely true. It was probably his favorite thing to tease those around him with information that made no sense when they didn’t know who he was talking about.</p><p>“They get quite adventurous about where we have sex, which you wouldn’t believe if you knew who they were.”</p><p>“Like?”</p><p>“My car happens a lot. A bathroom sink at the one party I went to this year was quite fun.”</p><p>“Weren’t you high as hell?”</p><p>“No.” Kind of. He was a little high but it wasn’t the worst he had ever been before.</p><p>“Anything else?”</p><p>“When they get really stressed, they chain smoke. I’ve joined in a couple times. It usually happens late at night. Our conversations get way too deep then.”</p><p>“What do you talk about?” She started running her fingers through his hair. It was a habit that they had picked up as children and it had only gotten more intense after the king died. It was a habit his lover had picked up too.</p><p>“Everything. Life, death, what it all means. Literature, philosophy, what it really means to be in love.”</p><p>“It certainly sounds like they can keep up with your madness.” They could. That was one of the things he liked about them. “Are they coming over tonight?”</p><p>“I don’t know. Probably. They come over most nights. They help me sleep.”</p><p>She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and sat her chin on his head, “You really do sound like the happier Hamlet that I knew as a kid. I’ll be okay if you don’t tell me as long as they make you this happy. As long as they continue to love you this much.”</p><p>He couldn’t reply. He was just relieved that she was someone he could talk about his lover with without having to worry about being hounded for a name. A name that really meant nothing until he put meaning to it.</p><p>Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.</p><p> </p><p>       +1. Horatio</p><p>Horatio opened the door to the suite to the sound of a groan from the occupant. Hamlet had thrown himself onto the couch and had much of his schoolwork tossed across the room and on the table in front of him.</p><p>“I see studying is going well,” Horatio closed the door as he spoke.</p><p>“Oh my dear Horatio, you’ve come to save me.”</p><p>“I live here.” Horatio had moved into the extra room in the suite. It was technically meant for the prince’s manservant but Hamlet didn’t have one of those. He did have a friend that needed housing since he could barely afford tuition.</p><p>Hamlet sat up and rolled his eyes when Horatio actually got his notebooks out and acted like he was going to actually work. Hamlet took the notebook out of Horatio’s hand and threw it on the ground.</p><p>“Pay attention to me.” Horatio laughed slightly but did relent.</p><p>“Ophelia told me you were talking about your secret lover a few days ago.”</p><p>“It was after getting cornered by our favorite morons.”</p><p>“Are you ever going to tell people who it is?” Horatio would never admit to anyone that he knew who Hamlet’s lover was. Although, no one had really thought to ask him except for Ophelia, despite all of them knowing he lived there.</p><p>“Why would I?” Hamlet sighed and fell against Horatio’s lap, “I will admit that Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are getting quite annoying with their constant questioning.”</p><p>“Why does it bother you so much?” Horatio ran his fingers through soft hair.</p><p>“People think they have a right to know and they don’t. Is it really so strange that I want to keep this little bit of my life away from the public? Everything about me is scrutinized by those around me and the media and I don’t want that to end this for me.”</p><p>“What, are you concerned that Rosencrantz and Guildenstern will put their combined brain cell to work and figure out who this lover of yours is?” Horatio asked, Hamlet laughed far more at that than he probably should have. They were technically his friends after all, even though their allegiance was more aligned with his uncle than it used to be.</p><p>“I’m less worried about that, and more worried that Ophelia will figure it out on her own.”</p><p>“Would it really be so bad if she knew? She wouldn’t tell anyone.”</p><p>“That ruins the fun of having a secret. Luckily,” Hamlet sat up and got closer to Horatio, “one of us has put up a good front of being both straight and far too polite to be the legendary person that I bed most nights.”</p><p>“God, I hate when you talk like that.”</p><p>“Then maybe you should shut me up.”</p><p>“No offense, my lord, but you never shut up. Having anything occupying your mouth does almost nothing.”</p><p>“You speak from experience?”</p><p>“You know I do.”</p><p>“I don’t know if I believe you, maybe you should prove it.” Horatio slipped one of his hands into Hamlet’s hair and pulled his closer, closing the already small gap between their lips.</p><p>Hamlet moved so that he was straddling the other’s lap. Horatio let his hands move further down and pulled the prince closer. It certainly was a power rush to have a crown prince in his lap, especially when he knew that he was in control here.</p><p>Nimble, trained fingered unbuttoned the top buttons of the shirt Horatio was wearing. It was a normal part of their activities so Horatio just tilted his head so that more flawless skin was open for Hamlet to explore. Horatio could also tell that Hamlet was trying so hard to not make a noise, solely to prove Horatio wrong.</p><p>Horatio could tell that Hamlet was really struggling since he had been in one spot under Horatio’s ear for more than a minute. Horatio figured he would show the prince some mercy.</p><p>“Do I really walk like a god?” Hamlet lifted his head so that he could meet the other’s eyes.</p><p>“How long has that been bothering you?”</p><p>“Since you said it,” Horatio sounded almost embarrassed by the praise. And knowing Horatio, he probably was.</p><p>“You do. Sometimes you walk around this place like you own it, like you’re the royalty here and not me. Like people should bow at your feet and worship the ground you walk on as you grace us with your presence. And I happen to love it.”</p><p>“If I do that, it is unintentional.”</p><p>“That’s what makes it so incredibly intoxicating.” Hamlet returned to the spot under Horatio’s ear, working on pulling tiny moans out of Horatio. “Your moans are better than any drug.”</p><p>Horatio let this continue for a few more moments, knowing that he was going to have bruises on the crook on his neck where Hamlet had moved his shirt. It was a good thing he was always cold and was usually seen in collared shirt, even before he was with Hamlet.</p><p>“We really did need to work on things my lord,” Horatio pushed against Hamlet’s shoulder to try and put distance between them.</p><p>“Later,” Hamlet didn’t move and instead whispered the word against Horatio’s skin.</p><p>“You say that every time.”</p><p>“One of these times I’ll mean it,” Hamlet was too distracted by the unimpressed look he was getting to return to his previous activities, “Probably.”</p><p>“Just not this time?”</p><p>“Not this time. This time, I want you to fuck me into this couch so good I forget my name.”</p><p>“It’s a good thing I love you.”</p><p>“I love you too,” Hamlet placed a soft kiss against Horatio’s lips, which was all the other man was expecting to get this second, “Now, about my request for the night.”</p><p>“I think you’re doable.”</p><p>“Did you mean it’s doable?”</p><p>“I said what I said.” Hamlet could only laugh as a response. Ophelia was right, Horatio had reminded what him what being happy was like. They had all been right, in their own special way. This was something he begged for, this was something that occupied so much of his mind, this was something important that he wanted to hold on to, this was something that he wasn’t willing to share with the world.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yo, just showing up to like a dead fandom because I fall into strange holes and here's what came out of it. Also, I had to read Hamlet for a class and I was very upset that people think these two are straight. They are obviously in love and you can't convince me otherwise. </p><p>Come fangirl with me/say hello on my Tumblr or Twitter. Both are @MargotCelvin !</p><p>Leave some comments and kudos if you wish, they fuel and terrify me.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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